We are constantly seeking out the best training and resources to support adoptive and foster families across the state. Recently, we had the privilege of attending a training led by Barb Clark of Families Rising, and we were deeply impressed by the practical tools and insights she shared, particularly the concept of the “Developmental Quadrant.”
Many of the children we serve have experienced prenatal substance exposure, trauma, and other challenges that can significantly impact their development. This means their chronological age (the age they actually are) often doesn’t align with their emotional, social, or cognitive development. Understanding this disconnect is crucial for effective parenting, caregiving, and advocacy.
That’s where the Developmental Quadrant comes in. It’s a simple, but powerful tool that helps parents and caregivers identify the different developmental ages of a child. Consider the following:
· Physical/Chronological Age: Their actual age.
· Emotional Age: How they express and manage emotions, react to situations, and what types of activities bring them joy.
· Social Age: Who they connect with, what kinds of activities they enjoy with peers, and their understanding of social cues.
· Cognitive Age: Their academic abilities, problem-solving skills, and overall intellectual functioning.
We can gain a much clearer picture of a child’s individual needs and strengths. Why is the Developmental Quadrant so important? Think about it: if you expect a 12-year-old to behave like a typical 12-year-old, but their emotional age is closer to that of an 8-year-old, you’re setting them up for failure and yourself for frustration. By recognizing the discrepancy, we can adjust our expectations and parenting strategies to better meet them where they are.
Key Takeaways from Barb Clark’s Training:
Inconsistency is Normal: Children with trauma histories may exhibit inconsistent behavior. They might be remarkably competent in one area and struggle in another, even within the same hour. This inconsistency can be challenging, but it’s essential to remember that it’s a result of the impact of trauma on their developing brains.
Reframing is Key: It takes time to shift from parenting based solely on chronological age to incorporating developmental age. However, this shift can significantly reduce misunderstandings, power struggles, and challenging behaviors.
Advocate for Their Needs: Understanding your child’s cognitive age is essential for advocating for appropriate educational support. Share the quadrant with school personnel to ensure they understand your child’s learning needs and can provide tailored instruction.
Using the Developmental Quadrant in Practice:
Barb Clark provided us with a blank Developmental Quadrant to fill out for each child. This exercise prompts us to thoughtfully consider each area of development and compare it to a neurotypical child of the same age.
By understanding the disconnects among the child’s ages we can provide better guidance and prepare for any challenging behaviors that may arise. Through understanding the cognitive age, we can in turn advocate better for them.
Ready to get started discover insights about your children with the Developmental Quadrant? Click the button below to download the worksheet!
Here to Support You
The Kansas Post Adoption Resource Center and the Kansas Caregiver Support Network are committed to providing ongoing support and resources to adoptive, foster, and kinship families. We believe the principles of Families Rising and the Developmental Quadrant are invaluable tools for creating more understanding, compassionate, and effective caregiving environments. We encourage you to explore the resources available through Families Rising as we plan to incorporate this framework into our own training and support services. Together, we can help children heal, grow, and thrive!